Thursday, April 30, 2009

Hello

How are you?
Good?
What's that?
How am I?
Oh! Hahaha...
I think I'm dying.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Doctor says:

I am 15 pounds under-weight. Therefore I apparently have an eating disorder. I do not.

...and the snowball keeps a-rollin'...

I am tired all the time. I might be anemic. I might have a thyroid(hormones) problem. Blood work was done.

...a-rollin' down the hill...

Then the doctor asked, "Have you been feeling depressed lately?" My mom looked at me, "Yeah, I'm gonna go there." She says, "Currie cuts herself." As blatant as that. The doctor checks my wrist and writes something on her clipboard. She hands my mom a buisness card, "Here's a psychiatrist that specializes in adolescents and depression."

...The snowball crashes into a rock...


Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Books are harder than Heads

Friday: I got into an argument with my father. He threw a book at me. It hit me in the head. I was bleeding. I was woozy. He shut off my phone in spite. It is, no, was the only connection I had to my love and my friends.

Saturday: My mother picked me up. Rescued me from my father. My father got a call from the school. I have a Saturday detention a few weeks from now. He called me. He yelled at me. He called me a whore. He said I should never see my love and friends again. I hung up on him. I ran outside. My mother caught me and got mad at me for treating my father with such disrespect.

Sunday: Depression.

Monday: Sleep.

Today: Doctors appointment. I shouldn't be this tired all the time. Then a dentist appointment. The place where everytime I go, they deteriorate my self-esteem just a little bit more.

I have a half an hour.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Tired

I woke up this morning, got out of bed. There was something not right.

I am exhausted.

I am always exhausted.

I sat there this morning, trying to get up, to get dressed, I couldn't.

I was too tired.

When I found the will to actually stand up, my legs gave out within ten seconds. I fell.